


Revisiting The Past

by yelyahtaylor



Category: Paramore
Genre: Tayley
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-15 12:47:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28563780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yelyahtaylor/pseuds/yelyahtaylor
Summary: Hayley takes Taylor back to her hometown before their birthdays.
Relationships: Tayley - Relationship
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	Revisiting The Past

“I used to throw pencils at this door when my mom would call me for dinner and I was in my writing zone” Hayley giggled, looking at the door that lead to her childhood bedroom; a room with so many memories she thought she left behind when her young self left Mississippi. 

“Oh so you really were edgy after all. Thought it was just a cover so you could get Josh to notice you” Taylor smirked to which earned him a punch in the arm by his petite girlfriend.  
“Shut up, and he didn’t even notice me until after Hunter said something” she defended and he rubbed his arm, looking hurt.  
“That hurt me!” Taylor playfully shouted and she did it again, this time with her left hand instead so the ring she wore on her right hand wasn’t in the way.  
“Hayley!” He rubbed his other arm and she stuck her tongue out, running into her old, pink painted bedroom.  
“Can’t hit me cause I’m a girl!”  
“You’re also fair skinned and will bruise! Remember when I threw you into bed and your leg bruise from hitting it against the footboard?” He questioned going into the room and she pouted, nodding.

Taylor looked around the bedroom, taking note of the mould forming in corners and the carpet rolling up in the corners. Hayley told him that no one had lived in the home since two thousand and five, she moved in two thousand and one but the home did not change from the pictures she showed him. When it was bought by Hayley’s mother in two thousand and one, the new owners used it as a place to rent until eventually giving up on it but regardless of how long it had been sitting untouched, it still looked so rundown and dark. Despite all the bright colored rooms and the Hello Kitty stickers that never left her closet door (mostly because it would ruin the thin walls), the stories Hayley told him made the place seem almost haunted. His heart ached at the thought of five year old Hayley pressing her ear to the door, listening to her parents scream at each other down the hall in the living room. 

Taylor never understood the pain his best friend and the love of his life felt when they were young. He recalled the very many times Zac, sometimes even Josh, would call Taylor, asking if one of his brothers could pick them up to spend a night at his place with his “American Dream Family” as Zac’s older brother, Nate, once referred The York’s as; two happily married parents with three sons living in a nice Nashville home, both inside and out with almost never any fighting or crying unless it was Taylor causing a ruckus to get his brother’s attention.

Taylor also recalled the times at Janine Farro’s home, Zac and Josh’s mom, where Hayley would stay late after dance class because she feared her stepdad. Taylor tried to be the best person he could be for his hurting friends, even at a young age he always tried but with never truly experiencing half of what they did, he couldn’t help much besides offering home baked cookies or a sleepover in his basement. Without knowing at the time however, those sleepovers saved his friends from another night of crying in their beds. 

“You okay, T?” Hayley asked, taking him out of his staring competition with the window and he looked at the blonde, nodding.  
“Yeah, why?” He held his hand out for her to take to which she did without breaking eye contact with him. She then gently placed a hand on his cheek, the other resting on his shoulder and she kissed his chin.  
“You’re thinking about something. I can tell”  
“I would hope I look intelligent when I think” he teased she smiled, rolling her eyes.  
“Not what I meant, and you don’t just look intelligent, you also look hot” she stated, he kissed her forehead and wrapped his arms around her small frame. 

“I was just thinking” he started and Hayley nodded, walking her fingers up his shoulder toward his neck.  
“About what?”  
“This place, the fact this is where you grew up” he trailed off and she looked down, nodding.  
“It was awful, Taylor. It was- I remember running down the street some nights in my bunny slippers, banging on granny and grandat’s door way past my bedtime because I was scared and getting to lay between them in their bed, I felt so warm, so safe with them. I felt like no one could hurt me if I covered my head or if granny was singing songbird” she mumbled, almost as if she didn’t want him to hear; he heard it all. He rubbed her sides gently, swaying them. 

Hayley’s therapist had advised her before that a way to grow from her past and from her trauma was to face the things that scared her the most. She feared her ex’s husband’s ex wife, Sherri; she would run away from Texas any chance she got because she didn’t want to accidentally run into her on the street. Hayley even went as far as to write Grow Up, a song from their Self Titled album that was a response to Eisley’s song Sad, as a way to prove to Sherri that Hayley was right and that she was so madly in love. 

Hayley knew deep down that she couldn’t be more wrong but she allowed the guilt to consume her and masked the pain by plastering her relationship with her now ex on social media so people saw their smiling faces. Little did anyone know, those smiles and love songs came with a cost and now, now that she’s genuinely happy and in love with someone who has never treated her any less than a princess as her own grandfather worded it, she protected the relationship with her all; even if it meant looking like a fool and avoiding Taylor’s entire existence so people wouldn’t catch on, they did though.

When her therapist encouraged her to reach out to Sherri, Hayley quite literally had a heart attack; a million in one things ran through her head.

‘Would Sherri tell me where to go?

‘Would she block me?’

‘Would she say i told you so?’

‘What if she says I deserved it for ruining her marriage?’

All her panic soon eased when Sherri so kindly accepted her Instagram direct message and they spoke for three hours the first night upon apologies and awkwardness. Since then, the two grown women had become good friends, such good friends that the DuPree family even receive goodDYEyoung packages on the rare occasion. 

Hayley’s childhood however, was a very touchy subject. It wasn’t like her relationship with Chad where Taylor saw or heard things happen and tried talking to her about it. She had so much trauma from her parents marriage and their significant others following the divorce that the thought of ever returning to her hometown as a form of closure made her skin crawl and breath hitch. She had been intending to take this trip since her intense therapy “vacation” as Hayley called it from time to time around Taylor to lighten the mood just a touch; he encouraged her to take the drive back to Meridian but Hayley did not want to do it alone so, prior to her thirty second birthday which was less than two weeks away, Taylor agreed to drive the pair six hours so she wouldn’t be alone. 

“Wanna go see your old school?” Taylor asked softly and she nodded, lifting her head just enough to kiss his chest before wrapping her arms tightly around his torso.  
“Hayley?” He whispered, Hayley simply shook her head.  
“Thank you” she whispered, looking up at him. He gently brushed her bangs so her eyelashes weren’t touching them and she offered a small smile as a thank you.  
“For what?”  
“For coming here with me. I know you’re gonna tell me it’s what a relationship is supposed to be but you truly do not know how much I appreciate you being here” she told him. He just gently kissed her forehead, rubbing her upper back.  
“I love you”  
“I love you too, T. I love you a lot” she pressed her face right into his chest, digging her nose in and he smiled, twirling a piece of hair from her loose ponytail around his finger. 

The couple stood there in a comfortable silence, gently swaying each other side to side as Taylor continued looking around and Hayley, with her eyes closed, reflected. She reflected on her past, on her present and her future; the future her and Taylor were planning. They already had colors for the music room, master bedroom and, despite not yet having children, the nursery. They were going to paint the entire house together before officially moving in instead of having the contractors do it because they wanted to be able to complete one challenging task together at The York residence. One task that wasn’t assembling anything from IKEA because between Taylor’s smoke breaks and Alf running away with parts of the furniture they needed, it would not get done for days.

“She’s gonna love this” Hayley finally spoke up. Taylor smiled, kissing her head.  
“Who is?”  
“My therapist. I talk to her on Tuesday and I didn’t even tell her I was coming here so she’s gonna be so shocked” she smiled and he chuckled, flattening out the hood from the hoodie she had on under her printed jacket; a hoodie she stole one of the first nights she stayed at his house and never gave back.  
“She’s gonna be proud, not shocked” Taylor told her.  
“God I hope so. I’m not walking through this house just for her to tell me good job!” She joked, trying to keep herself from laughing yet he couldn’t help but snort at his girlfriend’s tone of voice.

She blew him a kiss and walked out of her old room but looked back into it, taking in the room one last time before nodding and walking down the hall. Taylor soon followed, watching as Hayley peeked into every room once more; her bedroom was the last one they went in so it was the first they said goodbye to. 

“Ready?” Hayley asked, now standing at the front door.  
“Ready when you are” he nodded and she smiled, putting her hands in her jacket pockets.  
“Oh I’m ready, ready to show you the park where I pushed this dude name Jackson off the slide because he kept calling me a weak girl” she laughed and he shook his head.  
“You’re real violent for someone who’s barely five foot”  
“Hey, I became queen of the playground after that so yeah, I had to be a little violent cause I have no height” she stepped out and he smiled, looking around one last time before following and closing the door behind them. 

They were technically trespassing as the neighbor let them in since they had the spare key from under a flower pot. The neighbors were kind enough to keep the doors locked so it wouldn’t get vandalized and the kind woman, who’s name they learned was Olivia, told Hayley that she enjoyed watering the rose bushes to keep the property from truly looking abandoned. Hayley was right about everyone being so kind on her street. 

As they began walking the same route Hayley took every morning to school, she pointed out certain houses that belonged to old friends or the ones of neighbors that said hi to her when she passed by. Taylor watched around them; they had known each other for half their lives but never did he ever see her childhood home or school. Taylor always knew she had a rough upbringing but Hayley usually brushed over it until she wed; that was when they truly became vulnerable with one another and became transparent with each other. Taylor didn’t like pushing the topic of her past but with them wanting to start their own family and Hayley fairly recently having an anxiety attack overthinking her somehow mentally damaging their child because of her own trauma, she decided it was time to make the move.

Something a lot of people did not know about Hayley was that she suffered from anxiety attacks behind closed doors. They only got worse when she moved into her current Nashville home after separating from Chad and despite working on how to handle them, and doing an amazing job at that, they still came around. The only positive was that Taylor suffered from them a great deal in his early twenties so he knew ways to help calm her.

“Down that street is where I sprained my wrist trying to drift on my bike into my friend’s driveway” Hayley whispered, pointing to the street on Taylor’s right, hiding as if someone were to see her.  
“Let’s do it again” he laughed and she giggled, shaking her head.  
“My bones are basically disintegrating from all the years of head banging, I don’t think I need to break anything at age” 

He kissed her head, listening to Hayley talk about the familiar area she once used to roam around until the street lights turned on and she had to go inside for the night. It was astonishing to him that someone who came from a place so scary and broken, had the sweetest heart and most creative mind he had ever met. Every little thing she mentioned, good or bad, made his heart grow ten times the size. 

All because of her.


End file.
